It seems that I speak on depression a lot more when it comes to my blog. It could be because i separated some of this more personal stuff into a space independent from The Kilted Artist.
I know there are those who think I dwell on my depression. That thinking about depression will only make my depression worse. Yes, I live with depression. Yes, it makes some days worse. But does “dwelling” on it make it worse? Or, perhaps, does it help me turn on the light so to speak? Meaning does realizing that’s what it is help me do something about it.
I have gone to Hell and back more than once. Probably will again. Sounds pessimistic, but it isn’t. I have survived before, and I will again when the time comes.
Bouncing back from what happened at the beginning of the year has not been easy. Being betrayed by someone you thought was your best friend is a very difficult situation to recover from. Its worse when that person is a christian and aspiring youth pastor. Being told you have no integrity, that you are not a christian, and kicked out of where you are living cuts deeper than any blade ever will. All because I didn’t live up to someone else’s standards. There was no love. There was no grace. It was done out of selfish reasons, or at least that is all I can gather from a limited information.